What those brochures say -- and what they actually mean

We've all seen those brochures that describe a lodging place or packaged tour as just one step short of heaven.  Here, with thanks to Resources for Attorneys, is a translation of the brochures' glowing terms:

Old world charm = No bath
Tropical = Rainy
Majestic setting = A long way from town
Options galore = Nothing is included in the itinerary
Secluded hideaway = Impossible to find or get to
Pre-registered rooms = Already occupied
Explore on your own = Pay for it yourself
Knowledgeable trip hosts = They've flown in an airplane before
No extra fees = No extras
Nominal fee = Outrageous charge
Standard = Sub-standard
Deluxe = Standard
Superior = One free shower cap
All the amenities = Two free shower caps
Plush =  Top and bottom sheets
Gentle breezes =  Occasional gale-force winds
Light and airy = No air conditioning
Picturesque = Theme park nearby
Open bar = Free ice cubes

$99 NYC hotel rate, with breakfast included

Until Labor Day, rates at the recently opened Ace New York hotel begin at $99, and that includes breakfast.  Ace New York, in the city's NoMad (north of Madison Square Park) neighborhood, features local art throughout the lobby and guest rooms, turntables and records for a retro touch,  Other fun touches include in-room turntables with record selection curated by Other Music, fully stocked mini-bars, with lounges and restaurants to open in fall.

Visit www.acehotel.com/newyork or call 212-679-2222.

Trivial question

In which country will you find the Nullabor Plain? (Answer somewhere below.)

Pioneer Village is back in historic Salem

Pioneer Village in Salem, Mass., which calls itself America's first living history museum, has been around since 1930 but often has fallen on hard times, partly because it is a distance away from most of the city's other attractions. But now it is open again, under the management of Gordon College, and the college's theater group History Alive! stages performances there. What's more, a trolley offers a shuttle service from the city's Old Town Hall during July and August. Show tickets, which include trolley transportation, are available for under $10 and tours, with no shuttle service, are $5.

Visit www.pioneervillagesalem.com.

Worth quoting

"Visits always give pleasure -- if not the arrival, the departure."

                                                                                               -- Portuguese proverb

$59-$120 in complimentary extras on some deals

Hotwire travel-ticker has posted a variety of discounted offers with some complimentary extras, worth $59-$120,  thrown in. Depending where you stay, those extras may take various forms, airport transfers,   a  credit on laundry services and phone calls, spa credits, and free stays for children. In Ludlow, Vt., for example a stay at  Castle Hill Resort & Spa starts at $99, Sunday-Thursday, or $50 more on weekends. Plus, guests get $120 in extras.

Visit www.travel-ticker.com. And don't forget the hyphen.

Fascinating fact

Twenty-seven U.S. states have land north of Canada's southernmost point,  Middle Island, Ontario. Those states are Alaska, California, Connecticut, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada, New York, New Hampshire, North Dakota, Ohio, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Dakota, Utah, Vermont, Washington, Wisconsin and Wyoming. (With thanks to About.com.)

$18.72 gets you a complete meal at Maine resort

The Cliff House Resort & Spa in Ogunquit, Maine, is celebrating the fact that it has been owned and operated by the same family since 1872. Even day visitors can have lunch on the Ocean Terrace with the celebration menu's  entrée, dessert and glass of house wine or flight of Maine microbrew costing $18.72. At  dinner in the historic oceanfront dining room specials with choices like cornmeal dusted scallops and Fried Maine Lobster Rangoon, with glass of house wine,  also come in at $18.72.

Visit www.cliffhousemaine.com.

Trivial answer

Nullarbor Plain is in Australia. Nullarbor, which means "no tree, " lays claim to being the world's largest single piece of limestone and occupies an area of 77,200 square miles.